With friends like these . . .

Recently we've been on the receiving end of much kindness - meals, plane tickets, financial help, prayers and words of encouragement. I thought I'd share one such encouragement.

A good friend sent this to me yesterday. She was talking about a song that I have long struggled with. It's a song that talks about how much God loves us, and you'll remember this summer I talked about struggling with this. There was a time in church where I sat down and couldn't sing the song - struggling with the words - and I listened to my friend stand up and sing it out. Here is what she sent me:


"I remember this time so specifically because it was a day that I felt you were discouraged and just needed so desperately to be touched by the Lord's love. I belted it out harder than normal that day because I was singing for both of us. For whatever reason, every time I hear that song, I think of you. I think of the struggle you are in the midst of. I think of how important worship is to you and how you love to worship. At the same time, I know that finding a voice to praise is a trial at times. So, I decided to be the sacrifice of praise for you. I belt that song out normally but even more so now because of you.

We sang it again today. Love that song! So, I wanted to let you know that every time I think of or hear that song, I think of you. I know you aren't right now, but, in the future, do everything you can to keep your voice and to SING praises. satan hates it, and I know that it is something that has always ministered to you. At times like this, I think that our praise truly is a sacrifice of praise. We may not feel like praising or singing, but we know that we serve an amazing God who loves us beyond belief. He loves you beyond belief, Rebecca Lynn. Let his love and presence wash over you.

Know that I am praying and praising for you. I love you dearly!"


And this is what keeps me going - friends like this that love me and love on me and bring a sacrifice on my behalf. Friends have been Christ with skin on to me. This friend's husband also laid hands on Mike and wept for him as he prayed for healing. . . . The things that I have been unable or unwilling to do, God has provided someone to do them for me - that's how good He is - that's how loving He is - that's He loves us so . . . .

Mike update: Mike has been with my family in NH and will fly to Cleveland tomorrow. His uncle passed away suddenly this week, and Mike is going to Cleveland to do the funeral. I was weary of this at first but he ensured me he was well enough, and it was important for him to do so. Please bathe Saturday's service in prayer - prayer that Mike is used by the Lord to communicate His message and prayer that Mike will physically be okay to go all day. He will stay with his family through next week as I have conferences at school, and the plan is for him to be home on 11/6.

Update from Becka

Mike and I went home for my grandmother's funeral. As hard as it was, I kept telling the Lord the situation was good . . . and He was good. Although it was sudden, it was what Yia-yia would have wanted. And she's with Papou now, no doubt telling him what to do! It was a great weekend with family but a tough one for Mike. He had nine seizures in 24 hours and one that lasted for 17 minutes. It was very scary for me, and I was thankful to have family in the house. After this seizure activity, Mike lost the ability to talk. You'll remember he experienced this before as a side effect to medicine. This time the loss of speech is directly related to seizure activity. After some time of being seizure free (hours), his speech returns, but this is yet one more symptom that is frightening. Mike remained in NH while I flew back to work. We were concerned he was not stabile enough to fly. He was able to see his primary care from NH this morning and seizure med levels will be drawn to see if an increase is warranted. My mom has also started Mike on an elimination diet - eliminating artificial everything to see if this makes a difference. What would I do without my parents?!! The plan is for Mike to be stabilized and then fly home. To say the least, having this happen the weekend of my grandmother's services was extremely difficult. To get back on that plane without my husband because he was too sick was heartbreaking. Mike has officially been sick for a yr and 13 days, but who's counting?
Recently, a friend sent this my way:

Trust You
By Michael Gallaugher

I cannot see You in this darkness
All that I feel is misery
Every question goes unanswered
Every breath a desperate plea

I need strength for today, and hope for tomorrow

I stand in my pain and choose to trust You
I believe You know better than me
Though I don’t understand
I place my life in Your hands
And I worship You

I cannot hear You in this silence
All that I can feel is agony
But You’re still good in all I’m facing
You’re the Lord of stormy seas

I need strength for today, and hope for tomorrow

I stand in my pain and choose to trust You
I believe You know better than me
Though I don’t understand
I place my life in Your hands
And I worship You

Father come and hold me
Let your love surround me
Your compassion’s never-ending
Your mercy new each morning

I need strength for today, and hope for tomorrow

I stand in my pain and choose to trust You
I believe You know better than me
Though I don’t understand
I place my life in Your hands
And I worship You


These words are my heartbeat most days. I most resonate with needing hope for tomorrow and believing He knows me better than me . . . . and the trusting part I struggle with - but also don't know what else I'd do.
Thank you for your continued prayers and encouragement. You'll never know how much they mean.

Life Just Doesn't Stop

Dear friends, as many of you know, Becka's grandmother passed away Monday night. This comes just a year and a half after her grandfather died. Becka was VERY close to both, so there is a lot of grieving in a short amount of time. Becka is certainly not the only one that feels the loss, however. Yia Yia was loved by many and will be mourned by many. The Durkees have been blessed abundantly with tickets for both Mike and Becka to fly to NH for services, as well as money to kennel the dogs. They have also been on the receiving end of many delicious meals, which is one less thing to have to plan, buy and make. Although life doesn't stop for any amount of pain, God's hand has been there. The Durkees have seen it over and over.

A Mike update: Mike's new headache medicine has not worked at all. There is talk of trying another one as well as running a few more tests. Mike's head continues to pound and bring him to tears. Since seizure meds have been increased, the number of seizures has decreased, although Mike is seizing almost every day still. There is room to increase these again. Becka's body has started to feel the effects of stress as well. She has been fighting migraines off and on for two weeks. Prayers for protection of her health are appreciated. The Durkees did spend a fantastic weekend away with college friends. These friends were able to minister to the Durkees and love on them. They laid hands on Mike as he was actively seizing, and the Durkees felt such love - such sweet tangible love. . . . which is what Yia Yia was - God's sweet tangible love to the whole Kaas/Durkee family. How sweet it is for her to be dancing the streets of gold with her husband today in the presence of her Savior. It will be sweet, won't it?

Shocking!

A good family friend was kind enough to take Mike to his neuro appointment. The neuro said he didn't know what was going on with Mike, increased his seizure meds and started a new headache medicine. He said he didn't think the seizures and headaches were related, and he is the first neuro to say that - what's that? drs who disagree?? Shocking! The increased seizure meds and new headache med will take a while to level off in his system and time will tell if they will work. Mike is seizing several times a day for 10+ minutes which seems like an eternity to Becka. Mike is sore and tired. The Durkees feel beat up from the feet up and so very very discouraged. Much prayer for the new medication to work and lifted spirits is appreciated.

Update 10.3

Not much to tell this week. Mike was supposed to have 2 appointments with the neurologist this week that were canceled due to a death in the neuro's family. Mike is scheduled to go in tomorrow. The Durkees hope for the following: treatment for headaches and to get a handle on the seizures. It has been a week full of seizures and sickness. Mike and Becka both had colds that turned to bronchitis and a sinus infection. Mike has been seizing about 3 - 5 times a day and he is exhausted. With more seizure activity has come confusion, exhaustion, soreness, hand tremors and a cut up tongue from biting it during seizures. The Durkees are tired and hope that tomorrow brings direction.